Filter by Date
Dziennik Chicagoski -- September 05, 1891Sketches Depicting American Poles Too Late
It was indeed a great pleasure to describe the first two sketches--the "Self-made Man" and "Lucy"--because they represent persons of whom Poles in America may be proud, for such individuals bring credit to the Polish element in this country, for which they are respected and loved by our countrymen. And yet--I have been assailed on account of it, and it brought me unpleasantness because several persons discovered their own features in these sketches [and] came to the editor of Dziennik Chicagoski and demanded a correction, stating that a certain particular was not true, that this or that feature was false or omitted, that this detail was not stressed enough or that that one was stressed too much, and the result was that the editor, in reality, jumped all over me.
But these visits at the newspaper's office and these objections only prove that I have sketched typical characters, and that these sketches were taken simultaneously from different persons.2
With fear, I am going to describe the next sketch, because it is impossible for me to back out now, since I have already announced it and promised Dziennik Chicagoski Verbum Nobile Debet Esse Stabile. I am approaching this task with fear, for I am afraid that I will infuriate not only a few but many angered little damosels who will recognize themselves in this sketch. I am fortunate that they do not know me, especially Annie, whom I will try to sketch.
Please do not, after reading this long introduction, think that Annie is an unsympathetic person or what would be worse wicked, very bad, or worst of all ugly, unpleasant. On the contrary, she is a very charming person, and if I were a historian or a novelist I would say something about her carmine lips, blue eyes, pearl teeth, luxuriant locks of hair, pleasant personality, delightful manners, and other qualities. It would be impossible to describe all particulars in a sketch, therefore, I beg Annie to forgive me if I will see her in a different light than I saw her in the past, a light in which many of her admirers probably see her today. And I look upon her with pity, for she ought to be different from what she is in reality if she desires to belong to the Polish element in America.
It is not entirely Annie's fault that she is different; her father, like Lucy's 3father, is an ardent and well-known patriot; her mother is a Polish woman to the extent that she instilled in her daughter an attachment to the Polish nationality, but she was Americanized to the extent that she preferred the English language to Polish and used it at every opportunity, for she had learned it well during childhood, and for the same reason she used the other language unwillingly.
This circumstance of neglecting the Polish language was responsible for the Americanization of Annie, which was almost complete.
The father took good care of his sons' upbringing and education, and therefore had no time to worry about the education of Annie. Recognizing the necessity for his children also to know the English language well, he did not object if his daughter spoke English to him. Later on, very late, unfortunately too late, he became aware that his daughter had acquired a good knowledge of the English language but knew almost nothing about her native tongue; that she used it unwillingly and very seldom; whenever she was obliged to do so, she butchered it unmercifully.
Annie's father discovered this once when she was fourteen years of age, just 4before she enrolled in high school. He was disturbed by this discovery and decided to rectify it as far as possible, but could not accomplish much for it was too late. Annie was obliged to attend the public school, where the English language is used. Nothing could be done because at that time there were no Polish institutions of learning in America. Instead of that, Annie's father engaged a Polish choir teacher, who could not speak English, as instructor. Besides this, her father had arranged for evening receptions at which all conversations, recitations, and singing were held in Polish. Father encouraged Annie to take active part in Polish amateur plays. The beautiful English prayer book was replaced by a Polish one. Children were instructed to converse in Polish, and mother was also obliged to observe this procedure, at least in part.
Annie, just like Lucy of our last sketch, thought now and then about it and at times she even tried to overcome the difficulties, but this was only at times and gradually less often, because this task was already too difficult for her. She was at the age when a girl likes to make a good appearance and be admired by her associates, in which, unfortunately, she was encouraged by her mother. When it was necessary for her to converse or express herself in Polish, she lost her humor, self-assurance, and ease. Although they lived among Poles, Annie and her mother did not participate in Polish activities and amusements, which had a 5great influence upon Annie's mind and heart. They frequented English concerts, receptions, and theatrical plays which were sometimes very indecent, and read only English or rather American novels and storybooks because they were so diverting--Polish books were not understandable. They imbibed that which was harmful and disregarded that which was good. This unhealthy effect manifested itself in a short time through Annie's whole behavior, through her attire, her appearance, and everything.
Annie had ceased to be a Polish woman at the age of eighteen, though she might have thought that she still was. Reading cheap, unhealthy American editions, attending theaters which were also improper, accomplished the rest. Annie lost completely the characteristics of a Polish woman. The object of her life was to be attractive, but only externally and not by the good qualities of mind or heart.
Her attire, manners, conversations, jests, and even her performances as an amateur actress on the Polish stage, where she tried to imitate American actresses, were not Polish, and when it occurred to her that perhaps she did not act in the manner of a Polish actress, it was too late to change.6
A time also came for Annie to choose a husband, and she also had many suitors, perhaps more than Lucy. There were many kinds among them, but was there any one who would love Annie for the qualities of her heart or mind? Hardly, for she did not possess these qualities any more.
In the presence of these circumstances and at such an important moment, Annie once more became aware of her Polish nationality and thought that she should choose a Pole for her husband.
And she did in reality choose a Pole, but a Pole like herself, and this was quite natural. Her future husband was also educated superficially by reading light literature; he also took life lightly, knew very little about Polish, and had a good knowledge of English. It is not strange that her heart longed for him.
They were married and in a short time the Lord blessed them with a little son.
And a thought occurred in Annie's mind again--this is a Polish child, born of Polish parents, will he be a Pole? But who will teach him Polish?
It was indeed a great pleasure to describe the first two sketches--the "Self-made Man" and "Lucy"--because they represent persons of whom Poles in America may be proud, for such individuals ...
I C, I B 3 a, I B 3 b, III A
Secondary listingsPolish // Attitudes > Mores > Family Organization > Marriage (I B 3 a) ?
Polish // Attitudes > Mores > Family Organization > Parent-Child Relationship (I B 3 b) ?
Polish // Assimilation > Segregation (III A) ?
Dziennik Chicagoski -- February 11, 1892Peter Kiolbassa's Daughter Weds Francis Kwasigroch
Yesterday, at 10 A.M., two notable young Polish people, Miss Rosalie Kiolbassa, daughter of City Treasurer Kiolbassa, and Francis Kwasigroch were married amidst pomp at St. Stanislaus Kostki's Church. The reception was held at the spacious parish school hall.
The church overflowed with people, and many others crowded the entrance, to view the culmination of a romantic courtship. Andrew Kwasigroch, brother of Francis, parish choirmaster and singing teacher, and the church choir were at their best during the ceremony.
Among the two hundred guests at the reception were Carter H. Harrison and his wife, Mr. Kraus, one of the outstanding lawyers of Chicago, and a 2a number of relatives and close friends from many parts of the United States. During the course of the dinner many complimentary speeches, both in Polish and in English, were given. Peter Kiolbassa, with a smile and a tear, wished his daughter and son-in-law a long, happy and eventful life.
The entertainment was the finest in the history of the school hall. Music, singing, duets, quartets, and solos intrigued the many guests. However, the descriptive detail is omitted in order to give the highlights of the life of the newlyweds.
Francis Kwasigroch is a young man, who knew how to choose his companions and to make new friends of unquestionable character. His friends were, 3young and old, Polish and English. This association and his educational activities enabled him to become Americanized sooner than the average Pole in Chicago; however, he has remained close to the hearts of his native countrymen. Those who know him or have made his acquaintance have a pleasant, lasting impression of him. Many of us realize what a struggle it is to rise above the many temptations of a large city. Mr. Kwasigroch is a typical example of one who has accomplished this.
Today he has begun a new epoch of his life. As the wedding knot was tied important responsibilities were placed upon the shoulders of the young groom. The eyes of the new Polish-born generation and that of the American, as well as his parents and his wife's parents will be upon him, for he is the institutor of a new family.4
There are hundreds of examples of young people who have married without having a full understanding nor a full realization of the significance of marriage. As it happens, many of these people are responsible for unhappy family ties, broken homes, etc.
We do not attach any of these unpleasant experiences to the new husband. We know from his past record that his responsibilities will be faced with understanding and will be executed to the best of his ability. He will be a husband that his young and beautiful wife will be proud to speak of at any time. We are certain of this because his family life, education, social activity, and outside associations have always been of the best and finest character.5
Miss Rosalie Kiolbassa is the daughter of City Treasurer Peter Kiolbassa, who is considered today one of the outstanding Poles in America. Her family has been long active in civil activities in Chicago. Educated in Chicago schools, Miss Kiolbassa has become an outstanding figure of her sex in Polish activities. The Polish people of Chicago had many opportunities to see her perform in amateur theatricals. She has not only proved to be a fine actress, but her connection with St. Stanislaus Church choir and singing instructions have made her a singer of considerable repute. She has long been active in church and neighborhood activities.
Francis and Rosalie Kwasigroch are virtually the two outstanding Polish people of our new generation in Chicago. We wish them all the success and happiness that can befall any newly married couple. Let them always be the shining pearls of our people, of Chicago.
Yesterday, at 10 A.M., two notable young Polish people, Miss Rosalie Kiolbassa, daughter of City Treasurer Kiolbassa, and Francis Kwasigroch were married amidst pomp at St. Stanislaus Kostki's Church. The ...
I B 3 a, I F 4, I F 5, IV
Secondary listingsPolish // Attitudes > Politics > Extent of Influence (I F 4) ?
Polish // Attitudes > Politics > Political Leadership (I F 5) ?
Polish // Representative Individuals (IV) ?
Dziennik Chicagoski -- June 15, 1892[Polish-American Journals, Catholic and Liberal] (Editorial)
Our Polish-American Journalism is again besmirched by the appearance of a new weekly paper "dedicated," as it avers, "to the spread of liberal ideals". This Journal describes its program as follows:
"The task of the Polish Journal published here is to prepare its readers for independent thinking".
Hence, as this weekly states in another place, it desires that the people shall learn to think; that they shall not be subject to the influence of the views of others but draw their own conclusion about everything. But how does this weekly wish to undertake this? Thus, it avers:
"We believe that it is the duty of an organ dedicated to the Polish population 2of the United States to persuade the public to adopt those principles which are in spirit professed by the organ itself."
So its duty is to influence public opinion, so that an independent public opinion may be developed, not subject to any influence! Logical and beautiful; there is nothing more to be said.
We read farther on in the same articles:
"What has the Polish press in America accomplished in this respect? We are compelled openly to admit, though exposed to various attacks, that with one splendid exception, the popular and sincere journal Nowe Zycie (New Life) and also, to some extent in recent times, the Echo, there is no Polish paper of which one issue would satisfy the demands made by us in the above paragraph. Nearly all the rest of our Polish journals spread and propagate religious fanaticism, already deeply rooted in our people, we regret to say. They 3awaken racial passions, and standing on the ground of a falsely conceived patriotism, they talk the people into believing that only he is a Pole who complies blindly to prejudices of every type, who fears progress, who scorns enlightenment and tolerance."
He who read a short article in our Dziennik Chicagoski of last Friday, entitled "Age-Old Conceptions," and properly understood the satire contained therein, will find an epitome in a few of the above words of the often comical allegations made against us and collected by us in this article.
We always encounter the charge that Catholic periodicals are opposed to "progress and enlightenment". Whence this charge?
Did any Catholic periodical ever proclaim: Do not learn, do not enlighten; for your welfare and salvation depend on darkness? No; on the contrary, every truly Catholic periodical attempts to spread enlightenment as much as possible.4
Catholic papers do not limit themselves to matters pertinent to faith and morals; every truly good Catholic periodical endeavors to develop a clear conception of the various branches of education, in matters of foreign and national politics, and in all kinds of general knowledge.
These periodicals also take great pains about the moral elevation of the people in every manner. We know very well that our emigrants, principally members of the laboring class of Europe, were essentially very little enlightened; but they have made such extraordinary progress in enlightenment here in the last few years and have advanced so much in education that it must fill with astonishment nearly every unbiased person. Citizens have been made out of Polish peasants who take part in the government of the nation and occupy numerous posts in it. And to whom do they ascribe this? Perhaps to these "liberals"? This pestilence has but recently appeared among us. Our Polish-American citizens are essentially indebted for their enlightenment and progress first to those who toil with self-denial, the priests, and next to the Polish Catholic press.5
Let us compare the situation of our poor immigrants in the mines of Pennsylvania with the status of the immigrants in cities like Chicago. There one sees veritable darkness, slavery, bestial instincts, the lack of any education; here, the life of a free citizen of the United States. Compare even the conditions in New York with those existing in Chicago. There one finds numerous "liberals," freethinkers, so-called progressives; here in Chicago there are settlements around the parish churches. Except for that, they would suffer the misery which Poles suffer in New York, a life with no tomorrow, a lack of any principles, no participation in politics, and the empty vociferations [of agitators]; but the fact is that here we have wealth, rows of buildings and other real estate belonging to Poles, a live participation in political affairs, an ever increasing knowledge of political life, strong and powerful associations, and the respect of other nationalities.
Evidently progress and enlightenment reign here--there, retrogression and idle talk. What unbiased person will not acknowledge this?6
Yet these small gentlemen rave that they wish to teach progress and enlightenment! Evidently they understand something else under these terms than education in the various branches of knowledge, or participation in public life, or mutual moral support and a safe existence on the basis of this enlightenment. Yes; by "progress and enlightenment" they mean something else. They themselves openly define it. By these terms they mean "liberation from every type of prejudice," or in plain words loss of faith. Of what can they accuse religion if they themselves are already so unfortunate as not to profess it? Does religion propagate immorality? Does it teach what the majority of them teach, the breaking of family ties and the commission of one act of madness after another, later to short one's self and miss, finally deriving some benefit of [such attempted] suicide by gaining renown and acclaim for being a martyr to one's principles?
Does religion, truly and sincerely professed, bring calamity upon any one?7
Certainly not. In reality [these liberals] cannot forgive this "religious fanaticism" because it does not make other people like them, because it establishes family ties, because it elevates and spreads true morality and not an empty-mouthed civilization.
Show us this progress of yours; indicate how you gain in importance and in respect among others, in peace, in success, in a life worth living! Thank God, you will not mislead many as long as facts throw back your lies in your face.
You charge religion with intolerance. Yes, a truly religious person does not tolerate that which stands in contradiction to religion. He does not tolerate crime; he does not tolerate transgression; he does not tolerate anything that is opposed to the teaching of experience and faith. Could it be otherwise? As long as I acknowledge the principles of goodness and truth, of the sacredness of family ties, can I give any assurance to my child or to my friend or to my brother that those who do not maintain their family ties are doing well?8
If I believe that God, while most beneficent, is also most just and will punish me for my sins and reward me for my good deeds, can I at the same time instruct a student under my care that those who state the contrary are also justifiable? In this respect Catholic periodicals must be intolerant.
And you, progressives, are you more tolerant? By declaring war on this so-called "religious fanaticism," do you respect the convictions of others? By accrediting to yourself "the duty of influencing public opinion" are you governed by tolerance? Whence do you come? Who sent you? Where did you acquire knowledge to teach others? Of what progress and enlightenment and civilization are you the product that you should exalt yourselves before others as teachers? Or does your light come of yourselves! Satan, thy name is vanity!
Our Polish-American Journalism is again besmirched by the appearance of a new weekly paper "dedicated," as it avers, "to the spread of liberal ideals". This Journal describes its program as ...
III C, II B 2 d 1, I B 3 a, III A
Secondary listingsPolish // Contributions and Activities > Avocational and Intellectual > Intellectual > Publications > Newspapers (II B 2 d 1) ?
Polish // Attitudes > Mores > Family Organization > Marriage (I B 3 a) ?
Polish // Assimilation > Segregation (III A) ?
Dziennik Chicagoski -- October 17, 1893A Few Thoughts on Polish Day in Chicago (Submitted by Reverend Stanislaus Radziejewski)
As I rode in a horse-drawn trolley car to see the Polish Day parade, I found myself in the company of several young Polish women, one of whom was accompanied by her small daughter. They spoke among themselves in fluent English; the mother spoke to her daughter in English also. From time to time they spoke in Polish, perhaps out of consideration for us two Poles in the ear, but their language was less fluent, and they spoke in Polish rather unwillingly; one could even perceive a certain disregard for the Polish language [in their tone of voice].
I thought to myself: What does this Polish parade mean, the Polish uniforms, the feats bearing figures of Sebieski, Jadwiga, Koseiusko, Pulaski,...? Have these young Polish women, who speak among themselves and to their children in English, decided henceforth to use the Polish language? Will Polish Boy 2change in any way the relation between Poles and Americans?
It seems to me that the relations between the Poles and Americans, and among the Poles themselves, will be the same after Polish Day as they were before.
There are two sides to every question, and so it is with Polish Day. The Day can be regarded from two points of view. The parade was beyond doubt a splendid one, equal to any and perhaps more colorful than others, thanks to the choice of subjects, Polish good taste, and the picturesqueness of Polish costumes. The celebration on the Fair grounds may have been less effective, but here, too, one could say: "Well done"--as far as external appearances are concerned.
But whoever looked upon this manifestation with an eye to something more than more external splendor, could not be carried away with joy; he could not but have certain thoughts which fill the hearts of all Poles who observe American Polonia closely.3
Polish Day would have filled every Pole with real joy, had the splendid external appearances corresponded with conditions as they really are; it is the fact that they do not, which saddens me. Many a man may look well and yet carry illness within his breast. One cannot judge by external appearances! What good are these festivals when the Polish language is being lost or mutilated among the Poles here, or when there is no lack of unhealthy symptoms in Polish-American life?
I mentioned the young Polish women who spoke in English. The priests, who have the best opportunity of knowing the people, claim that the children of Poles born in America will not speak the Polish language. On the farms, this may net be strictly true, but in the cities, the new generations are being Americanized. Many, although they speak Polish, mix in a great many English expressions; either they have been influenced by contact with Americans, or it is merely coxcombry, or negligence, for a Polish expression can be found for anything one wishes to say.4
The same condition exists in America as existed in Poland, where the Poles came in contact with Germans in Upper Silesia, Prussia, and Poznan. Poles readily accept what is foreign, and girls and women sin most in this respect.
Immigration is being restricted, it becomes more and more difficult to find work here in America, and consequently, less and less Poles will be coming here from Poland. Poles born here are being denationalized at least to a certain extent--the future is a sad and gloomy one; the brilliant flash of Polish Day is not enough to dispel the dark clouds that are gathering. Parents, unfortunately, either do not want to, or do not know how to instill in the hearts of their children a deep love for Poland--a love which would endure throughout their lives, and be passed on to future generations. Not all Polish children attend Polish schools, and even the Polish school has little permanent effect upon the new generation; children succumb to the influence of the streets and the conditions under which they live and work. The children never know Poland; they have nothing to gain from speaking Polish. Many a Pole marries a girl of different nationality, and vice versa. All this tends to denationalize the Poles 5in America; first, their mother tongue is lost, then their nationality, for language and nationality are very closely associated.
The status of the Polish language is, then, a dark cloud on the horizon of the Polish nation in America. There are other clouds also. I cannot write of everything here, for it would be harmful to mention some things, but every observant and thinking man knows that there is little harmony and love among the Poles. Proof of this lies in the variety of Polish newspapers here, in the variety of societies and organizations. Proof lies also in the fact that only a small percentage of Poles are members of alliances.
There ought to be one great Polish peoples' organization for all America, and in addition to this, local, specialized organizations fostering music, gymnastics, literature, and beneficent work. Every Pole ought then be a member of the general alliance and some specialized society.
It is said that many Poles trade at the stores of Jews and other foreigners 6instead of supporting their own countrymen. Many a Pole, too, has exploited his fellow-Poles. A too great percentage of Poles are guilty of intemperance, which, in the eyes of other peoples, is one of our national faults. We cannot expect everyone to be perfect, but it is bad if the percentage of evil people is the great.
Proof of how little brotherly love there is among the Poles is the great number of lawsuits between them, lawsuits that merely enrich the courts and the lawyers at the expense of the Poles and their good name.
Carelessness with or abandonment of the Polish language, lack of harmony and brotherly love--these are the clouds on the Polish-American horizon. Polish Day, however brilliant and cheering, did not dispel these clouds, nor even diminish them.
Outsiders admitted that Polish Day was a success; they wrote a little about the Poles, and said that Poles are to be reckoned with, not by Polish Day, but by 7how well they can agree among themselves, by their education, their wealth, their attainments in various fields of endeavor.
In a material sense, the Poles have shown themselves generous, especially in times as hard as the present. I have heard it remarked that it might have been better to use that money for the establishment of some Polish institution which would endure longer than one "Day", and continue to bear fruit as long as there are Poles in America, or that it could have been used to pay some of the debts encumbering the Polish schools. It is too late to speak of such things now--what has been done cannot be undone. As a matter of fact, even such a demonstration [Polish Day] may have been necessary.
The moral lesson is this: Let us be happy that Polish Day was a success, but let us not stop at more external demonstrations. Let us each look into his own heart and then into Polish relations here, and let us admit that the view is not as bright as when seen from the outside; let us determine to abandon the old Polish sins that have been carried over to this new land, that we will 8fulfill our duties as Poles in family, parish, and organization in respect to outsiders, that we will have brotherly love not only on our lips but in our acts, that we will distinguish ourselves by our virtue, knowledge, work, temperance, and honesty. Then can we be Poles externally, then will every day be Polish Day in America, sunny and cloudless!"
(Editorial Note to Above Letter)
We felt it our duty to print the above article, written by the well-deserving Reverend Stanislaus Radziejewski, recently arrived from Poland, although we cannot agree with all of the views expressed by the author. The article, presenting the opposite side of the medallion, speaks many truths to American Polonia; it points out our faults and urges us to reform. We join wholeheartedly in this conclusion, this appeal inspired by a deep attachment to the Polish cause. However, certain views of the author on Polish-American relations are, perhaps, a bit too pessimistic. We are not in so great a danger of denationalization as it would seem. Recently, we have been able to perceive a greater interest in Polish affairs and a sincere patriotism in our youngest 9generation. Our organizations are growing, the struggles ceasing. One thing and another are being done for the good of individuals and for the common good, which years ago were not even thought of.
Especially in the matter of Polish Day, we cannot agree with the opinion that it flashed with merely external brilliance and passed. On the contrary, it is our opinion that it produced permanent results. In the first place, for the first time in America, we have learned to work side by side, despite personal differences and past disagreements; at least for a short time, we joined hands and forget offences. It gave us a foundation for further work toward harmony and understanding. This one result constitutes a great improvement in Polish-American relations; it gives Polish Day the significance of a historical event in the annals of American Polonia.
In the second place, it was absolutely necessary in respect to our place in American society. We will not argue that Polish Day raised us in the opinion of Americans, but it is certain that the lack of our "Day" would have degraded us in their opinion, for it would have placed us below the American cultural 10level; our element would merely be tolerated, as are the Chinese, the Arabs, Syrians, etc.
Further, the manifestation was necessary to the Polish cause itself. A hundred years after the partition of Poland we have reminded the world in a brilliant demonstration that we still exist and that we have not renounced any of our rights. It could not be done in Europe--we did it in America. If however, we are concerned with the most immediate gain, educational, as it were, Polish Day has accomplished something there also. The Polish colors, the white eagles, the dramatic scenes, all bespoke patriotism to more than one young Polish heart much more effectively than hundreds of books or articles; they convinced more than one young Pole that it is no disgrace to be Polish, as he thought.
And thus, our "Day" was not merely a passing flash. We agree wholeheartedly with the Reverend Radziejewski's opinion that continual, antlike activity is necessary to keep down the weeds that crop out among us, that this is a fundamental upon which our community rests; we heartily support the expression with 11which he closes his article, but we insist that such demonstrations as that of Polish Day are sometimes--once in a long period of years--to raise the spirit and to give encouragement to further work.
As I rode in a horse-drawn trolley car to see the Polish Day parade, I found myself in the company of several young Polish women, one of whom was accompanied ...
III A, II B 1 c 3, I B 3 a, I B 1, I C
Secondary listingsPolish // Contributions and Activities > Avocational and Intellectual > Aesthetic > Theatrical > Festivals, Pageants, Fairs and Expositions (II B 1 c 3) ?
Polish // Attitudes > Mores > Family Organization > Marriage (I B 3 a) ?
Polish // Attitudes > Mores > Temperance (I B 1) ?
Polish // Attitudes > Own and Other National or Language Groups (I C) ?
Dziennik Chicagoski -- August 07, 1896A Correction
We published an advertisement in yesterday's paper in which Mr. Robert Koszynski announced that he was not responsible for the debts of his wife Agnes, and warned everyone not to lend her any money or give any goods on credit, because she has deserted him without any cause.
Mrs. Agnes Koszynska has requested us, in the name of truth and justice, to announce that she has gone to live with her parents, that she does not intend to hide, or purchase any goods on her husband's account, and that she left her husband, who had once before deserted her, because she refuses to attend services at the "Independent" Church, and that she is a member of the Saint Hedwig Church, which her husband forbids her to attend.
We published an advertisement in yesterday's paper in which Mr. Robert Koszynski announced that he was not responsible for the debts of his wife Agnes, and warned everyone not to ...
I B 3 a, III C
Secondary listingsPolish // Assimilation > National Churches and Sects (III C) ?
Card ImagesCard Image #1
Narod Polski -- December 27, 1899Marriage (A Letter to a Friend)
Marriage is a devilish affair full of changeable situations. If I should advise you today to "get married," you would bless me one hundred times and you would curse me one hundred times, I am sure. Just think--seven or eight years from now you return home tired as a setter after hunting. The rooms are full of smoke because the stoves went out of order. Two children are sick with scarlet fever, and the wife has an attack of hysteria or is sitting in a corner with eyes filled with tears and looks at you as if it were all your fault. Then, obviously, you begin to tear your hair in desperation and during this pleasant performance it suddenly dawns on you that I was the one that advised you to enter the bonds of marriage. Then you buy yourself some chalk, run to my home and in large letters you write on my door, "Here lives an old idiot!"
But, let us take for granted that I persuade you not to tie yourself up with a woman, and you, obedient to my persuasions, dismiss the thought of marriage.2
Do you judge that the result will be different? There will come a time when you will be troubled with stomach catarrh; there will come a time when sitting alone in your bachelor "cell" you will think if you could only get married you would have the warmth of the family circle; that you would be surrounded by a wreath of beautiful heads of children; that your lovely wife would be serving you tea and your oldest daughter would entertain you with stories. Then you would also buy chalk and write on the door of my home, "Here lives a boob above bobbs!"
You see, my young friend, misfortune is the unavoidable addition to our life; the dreary days blend with the bright without regard as to whether somebody enters your port of matrimony or you remain an old bachelor. The married man who has been chained for some length of time imagines during his sad moments and during misfortune, that fortunate are his unmarried friends, and the old bachelor thinks more than once, upon seeing some sympathetic scene from the family hearth, that the life of a bachelor is not worth a pinch of snuff.
Marriage is a devilish affair full of changeable situations. If I should advise you today to "get married," you would bless me one hundred times and you would curse me ...
I B 3 a
Narod Polski -- March 12, 1902"On Marriage"
A great number of suicides, murders and divorces noted especially by American Newspapers, indicate that either our legislation is worthless, or what seems most probable, the principles of bringing up and educating our generation does not answer the purpose. Something is wrong for facts prove that the number of victims and number of those, who, with their own hands, prematurely cut their span of life, is increasing daily, especially among the young. The person and revolver play the most important part. English, German and even Polish papers devote whole columns every day about murders, suicides, divorces, etc. To one who is not acquainted with the conditions, our newspapers appear as criminal records; A suitor shot a young lady because she did not return his love; or went to a ball with some one else. Another young lady poisoned herself because mother opposed her marriage with "Frank" or "Frank" was caught flirting with another girl. Young couples married sometimes only two or three months get their divorces for a very trifling reason. Let Hubby stay a little longer after the meeting or if he fails to buy her a hat or dress she likes, 2she runs directly to court for a divorce.
If a hard working husband, after a hard days work, is unwilling to beat the carpets, clean the stove, turn the washingmachine, wash the dishes, take care of the baby until midnight, immediately the loving spouse has a cause for a divorce, on the grounds of mistreatment. The other side is not any better. A seventeen or eighteen year old youngster (stripling) noticing only a hem of "Josies" white underskirt, after exchanging a few words with her on Saturday night and Sunday afternoon, gets married in a few weeks. But after the wedding an amorous husbands find out that his beautiful and cooing "Josephine" does not even know how to make coffee. He realizes, too late, that his wife beside the white hem of her underskirt has nothing else that is white. That she has no ability to mend clothes, sew on her husbands buttons or wash his soiled shirts. All she knows about house management is that there should be a stove in the kitchen, sofa and chairs in the parlor and bed in the bed room.
Suddenly the eyes of the married couple are opened. She envies "Eve", that she 3did not have to cook, scrub, mend and wash, and he envies Adam for not having trouble with buttons, carrying coal to the 3rd floor or looking for a new dress or gloves.
After a week or so, perhaps a few months later they start to aggravate each other. They disfigure their faces with pots and plates, and then divorce follows. Frank looks for another and so does Josie. This appears really funny but it is the truth, and you don't have to look very far in order to verify it.
It cannot be denied that marriages in America are contracted like by telephone. Sometimes the parents do not even suspect that their daughter gave her heart to the chose one, and who usually does not appear until the banns are to be announced. Such marriages usually have a sad ending. We have to counteract this evil and the best remedy is to keep the young lady home. She sould spend her time home studying domestic art, cooking, sewing for herself and family, so when she get married she will know how to manage the 4household. Unfortunately our parents care little for this. The sigh of a beautiful daughter, doll like, blinds them, fills them with joy. In order not to soil her daughters nice silk dress, mother does all the work and the nice daughter likes it. Later on this mother will complain that her son-in-law threw her daughter out, not realizing that her daughter outside of dressing up, powdering and rolling her black eyes does not know anything about keeping house, necessary for future life. Hence frequent divorces and scandals in marriages for which mothers are to blame. Blinded by their daughters they forget to bring them up properly. Mothers! remember that a beautiful dress or a hat shall not bring your daughter happiness, but cleanliness, economy and proper knowledge of domestic art, and what is more important, religious training. A young lade seeking only adornment and pleasure, who does not care for home and church, and indifferent in the matters of faith, will not, and cannot be a good wife, because the sacrament of matrimony is not sacred to her. She considers nuptial bonds as some kind of a sport, and for that reason it is not hard for her to break with the first or second man and unite with a third or fourth.
A great number of suicides, murders and divorces noted especially by American Newspapers, indicate that either our legislation is worthless, or what seems most probable, the principles of bringing up ...
I B 3 a, I B 3 b
Secondary listingsPolish // Attitudes > Mores > Family Organization > Parent-Child Relationship (I B 3 b) ?
Narod Polski -- January 13, 1904A Few Words about Keeping Order in the Home.
In many instances the cause of family quarrels is the failure on the part of the wife to develop a liking for keeping proper order in the home. In court the husbands claim that due to slovenliness they become disgusted with their wives and neglect them.
It is true that there is no greater fault in a housekeeper than her failure to keep an orderly and clean home. The husband stays long enough in dirt and dust during working hours so when he gets home he desires that his home, be it humble or elegant should be kept in order. A good wife and housekeeper will sweeten the life of the husband,who works so hard for that piece of bread, if she keeps clean the place where he seeks rest after returning from work, cares for his linens and other things pertaining to order. Woe be to him, who has picked 2himself a lifes companion, who has no conception of proper order. The home then becomes disgusting, the family becomes indifferent, the wife becomes aggravating and the husband starts to avoid his home, uses intoxicants freely and finally starts breaking of pots and plates over the head until the marriage ends in a divorce.
Everything in the home should be kept in order. The wife and mother should be distinguished by keeping clean her own body and dress. You do not have to enter the home to see how it looks. To pass by it is sufficient. Where one sees torn curtains in the window, where the window panes are smeared, where not one bit of neatness is to be found in front of the home, no grass not a flower or shrub, there you will find the inside of the home is no better.
You can also tell the mother by her children. When their dresses are clean and their faces washed, they have a clean mother, but just as soon as they are dirty and ragged you can not expect much from the mother. Therefore, the wife and mother is much to blame in regard to her family, because the children appear emaciated, pale and sickly, not from hunger but from dirt.3
Of course, you do not have to look at the husband and father. His shirt is dirty and torn, garments all rags. He is as lean as a rail, because he has not eaten regularly nor relished his meals because of a filthy home, he is infested with vermin and is worrying. The home no more being pleasing to him he goes to saloons in order to find enjoyment. If he has already lost his courage and energy he drinks more and more and finally the poor unfortunate becomes a confirmed drunkard. All this is true, but for what reason? Because of a slovenly and negligent wife.
It is true, that fortunately and especially among the Polish women we have very few of this kind, but it never hurts to present such a sad picture as a warning to our women readers.
In many instances the cause of family quarrels is the failure on the part of the wife to develop a liking for keeping proper order in the home. In court ...
I B 3 a
Narod Polski -- January 25, 1905Mixed Marriages
There is proof that the Catholic church has lost a million souls in the 19th century as a result of mixed marriages. This loss will be still greater as time passes on, and more grievous, because unfortunately the Catholics themselves are contributing to the weakening of Catholicism.
One source of these irreparable to the Catholic church are mixed marriages.
This is indeed a sad affair and the Catholic church, abandoned and betrayed by its own children can do nothing to prevent this harm. Even though the Catholic husband or Catholic wife receives from the mate or spouse of another faith permission to bring up the children in the Catholic religion, you know that even if the pact had been sealed seven times, the children of such a marriage are usually brought up in some other religion.
Unwise, therefore, is every Catholic who contracts a mixed marriage, and unfortunate is the mother who agrees that her child should be brought up in a strange religion.2
The Catholic church, in fact, tolerates mixed marriages, but this is no reason that it should praise them. For that reason it agrees to mixed marriages under three conditions: 1) The married couple must each promise that they will bring up their children in the Catholic religion; 2) The Catholic side of the marriage must promise that he or she will try and bring about the conversion of their mate or spouse; 3) The non-Catholic side of the marriage must promise that he or she will allow their mate or spouse to live according to the principles of the Catholic church.
Without exception there is not one such marriage in which as time passes on one or the other side does not admit that it would have been better if the marriage had not been concluded.
Therefore, the greatest enemy of the Catholic church is the mixed marriage, and it is so, due only to the general position of the Catholic church. We Polish-Catholics should go further and avoid, in general, mixed marriages with those of other nationalities. Quite often we come across a case where a Polish man or woman marries one of another nationality, thinking that there is no harm done. The one who so thinks is very much in error.3
Marrying one of another nationality, even if he or she be a Catholic, makes a person indifferent toward his own nationality and at the start one can be convinced that the children derived vrom such a marriage are lost to the Polish race. How easily the parent loses the sense of his nationality; how easily the son or grandson loses the sense of religion and goes over to non-Polish quarters, or non-Catholic.
The one to whom the sense of nationality is not an empty expression, the one that carries from his parental home the ardent love of native language and customs, that one should never desire to conclude matrimony with a person of another religion or nationality.
Marriage is the most faithful friendship for duration of life; it is the most complete union of thought and feeling. How can such a union be possible in a mixed marriage? How can you love a person to whom everything we love an honor as sacred is strange and indifferent?
Young people concluding often such hasty and unconsidered marriages, carried 4off with blind passion, deaf to the voice of judgment, do not see or feel at the moment the difference of nationality.
They have accustomed to another language in school and in their work or profession, why can't they get accustomed to it in their family life? Oh! What a sad mistake! The language is truly not the whole nationality but the language is necessary to reveal the nationality.
When you begin to speak in your family home in another language, then you have dug a grave for your nationality, it has died within you forever. Love will not overcome the obstacle dividing the husband, a Pole, and the wife of another nationality; love only temporarily screens it with seductive brightness. And when the passion subsides the married individuals see with dismay that there is missing between them that friendship, because there is lacking the spirit of companionship and, furthermore, there is no good fortune in their lives.
The Polish husband then has two extremes from which to choose: either deny 5his national impulses, discard from his heart all the ties binding him to matters pertaining to his fatherland or, remaining a Pole, exposes himself to indifference on the part of his wife and to family disputes which poison his life.
From the two evils, he chooses the one which in his opinion offers the least resistance, he ceases to be a Pole. He gradually moves away from Polish society, breaks his relations with his countrymen, and does not even read Polish books or newspapers, not wanting to irritate his wife.
What now can we say about the sad change in family conditions caused by a mixed marriage? The Polish language remains forever a false note destroying forever the harmony of family life.
For this reason the mixed marriage is almost without fail the cause of loosening of family relations. The wife of another nationality sees in every Polish word, in every Polish letter which she does not understand, some dislike, lack of confidence and bad intentions. She remains forever a stranger, inwardly, to the husband and his family.6
The husband of another nationality does not want his children to pray in Polish. The heart of the Polish wife bleeds at the thought that her child should pray in some other language. How can these contradictions be reconciled? Whose opinions will prevail? What sort of rearing can the children have under such conditions?
Unfortunately, we see such examples quite often. No matter from which side we consider the sad consequences of such alliances, they always appear before us, a vicious circle of contradiction, internal strife, sorrow, and bitterness.
There is proof that the Catholic church has lost a million souls in the 19th century as a result of mixed marriages. This loss will be still greater as time ...
III A, III C, I B 3 a
Secondary listingsPolish // Assimilation > National Churches and Sects (III C) ?
Polish // Attitudes > Mores > Family Organization > Marriage (I B 3 a) ?
Narod Polski -- December 13, 1905The Polish Woman in Home Life
Every man of sense and feeling knows that a good wife, a model housekeeper, and a mother who loves her children, is the guardian angel of the family, bringing good fortune and order to the family hearth. Therefore, the husband who is not spoiled to the bone under the gentle and noble influence of his wife, slowly gets rid of various faults and bad habits, becoming a useful man to his family and society.
A woman, if she knows how to conduct the affairs of her own little kingdom at home, will prepare a paradise for her husband, will gain for herself his true and lasting love, will rear the children according to God's way and will earn the respect of all.
We see today how some couples are mismated, to whom a joint life becomes a virtual hell and continuous suffering. On the other hand, we come across married couples that are happy, fortunate, always satisfied with their lot. In one family the head of which, a husband and father, earns less money per week than his neighbor and has more children to feed but in spite of this 2we see in his home neatness and order; the children are clean and neatly dressed; at home every piece of furniture is in its place; the food is nourishing, healthy, and always prepared on time; the housekeeper always joyfully greets her mate, returning home from work, and there can be seen a mutually satisfied and fortunate life.
There are, on the other hand, families to whom the ties of matrimony are a fatal weight. Both husband and wife are constantly walking around with a sour face, gloomy; one has no word of love for the other, only constant reproaches, provocations or curses. Even the greater earnings of the husband, here, is not sufficient because the husband not being able to find happiness at home goes to seek it in some saloon and there drowns his cares in a whiskey glass; the wife, then, bored at being home alone, neglects the care of the home, the children, and even herself so that the home becomes disliked, not only by the members of the family but also by strangers.
From the woman, therefore, should come happiness, beauty, and the welfare of the home. Our Polish women should be the personification of all that is good in home life. Alongside a good and consulting wife a husband becomes good, 3thrifty and industrious. The laziness and silly chattering of a wife does not bind a man to his home but the sensible care of the household and kind words for the one who has spent the whole day,by the sweat of his brow, earning the daily bread for himself and family.
Every man of sense and feeling knows that a good wife, a model housekeeper, and a mother who loves her children, is the guardian angel of the family, bringing good ...
I B 3 a, I B 3 b
Secondary listingsPolish // Attitudes > Mores > Family Organization > Parent-Child Relationship (I B 3 b) ?
Your search criteria returned no results.